Thread

1. purplepatrick · 1790817358 · focus · HN ↗

   Cute. Of course, beyond basic deal breakers, neither do people know their preferences (but they think they do), nor do the majority of preference categories actually matter.

   This is a common problem with all dating apps. Specifically, interests, hobbies, daily routines, objectives, etc. have nothing to do with compatibility.

   “We like the same things!” is the compatibility signal of a naive 22-yr old…

   1. rTX5CMRXIfFG · 1790829601 · focus · HN ↗

      Isn’t it the other way around, ie that you might be compatible with just anyone is more likely to be the idea of a naive 22-year old?

      As you grow older you’re going to have your own values, boundaries, non-negotiables. Thinking that you can just jump into dating and “open-mind” the singles scene is a huge sign of someone who hasn’t fully developed their sense of self just yet.

      1. crabbone · 1790870819 · focus · HN ↗

         Not in my experience. If anything, I don't see much or any difference between 50 and 30 y.o. profiles on dating sites (I haven't looked at anyone younger or older than that).

         No matter how old, most people have zero introspection or analytical ability, and even if they do, they would not put it on display because that would put them in the "weird" category.

         A typical women's profile will differ by country though. This is how most of this stuff looks:

         * South-East Asia: women describe themselves as "simple", "down to earth", "family oriented".

         * English-speaking Africa: "god-fearing", "faithful".

         * Western Europe: "like to travel", "love animals", "live off the land".

         Sometimes with a mix of trivia, like whether they are divorced, how many children, smoking cigarettes.

         I don't really know what makes people match, but if I have to guess, people go by non-verbal cues they find the the pictures. People reveal a lot about themselves in they way they dress, where and how they take the pictures.

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