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Silicon Valley 'sex assault list' with 'over 100' names circulated

94 points · 122 comments · Anon84

  1. throw931666666 · · focus · HN ↗
    Sorry for writing from a throwaway account because there's still a lot of stigma to this, while I think it's a pretty average experience.

    I had sex therapy to be able to understand where my fantasy ends, and where the real world starts, and how people in the real world aren't there to play the roles my fantasies give them.

    It sounds obvious when I say it like this but there are many men like me, who didn't grow up emotionally, and having difficulty accepting the agency of others. Women had to be interested in me so that I could feel validated. I also had never stopped and asked myself "does she really want this or am I trying to manipulate her?".

    You also see the same pattern with men who think it's their right to find a female partner and they feel wronged by the society when this doesn't automatically happen.

    Try getting some help, fellow men. It takes a lot of weight from your shoulders and you become much less likely to end up getting on such lists.

    1. eklavya · · focus · HN ↗
      WTF, I find it hard to believe that during a sexual assault, the perpetrator doesn't know what they are doing. WTF is this?
      1. myvoiceismypass · · focus · HN ↗
        I did not read it as OP assaulting women, but rather likely objectified most women as objects to fuck rather than people. (Sorry if that sounded blunt)
        1. owebmaster · · focus · HN ↗
          That's not what I got from his writing. That's normal behavior by both men and women. What OP described is manipulating them for his sexual pleasure, including making them do "non-conventional" things.
          1. em-bee · · focus · HN ↗
            That's normal behavior by both men and women

            no, it isn't. if you think it is then you should look for other friends.

            you are reading an awful lot into the comment.

            1. owebmaster · · focus · HN ↗
              Take a look at any dating apps, there are hundreds of millions of people objectifying people. Being good or bad doesn't change the fact it's normalized.
              1. em-bee · · focus · HN ↗
                it being normalized doesn't make it normal. the critical point here is that it should not be normal, and the only way to make it not normal is to say so. coming out and repeating that it is normal only helps to normalize it further. in my circles it is not normal. but in part that is because i stay away from people who think it is normal. and it could be that i am in the minority, but i hope not. either way, this needs to be called out and opposed, and my complaint to you is that you are not opposing it.
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